|  Here's a nice way to wake up. Especially on weekends, but even weekdays is nice. 
 I love it when I wake up slowly, rolling over on my aching morning wood boner. Dreaming about fucking some sexy young woman or getting sucked by some cum-addicted guy. Maybe I even wake up enough to pull my hard penis out of my underwear just so it can reach maximum hardness without restraint.
 
 And then I hear a soft chime from my iPhone. It's the sound I reserve for only one thing: a new email in the account I only use for finding cock suckers. Someone is up early and thinking about my penis.
 
 I reach for my glasses and open my phone.
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